Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Death... and then a new beautiful life.

Easter is rapidly approaching us. Of course this means Easter candy, cute little fuzzy bunnies and chickens, hiding eggs, and getting together with family and friends to celebrate the holiday. Often times many forget what Easter is all about. I have to admit, year after year, I stress out about what to put in those Easter baskets knowing all along that the baskets have absolutely nothing to do with the real Easter. Like Christmas, the real meaning of Easter has been long forgotten for many people.

Christians know that Christ died on the cross for our sins. He died on the cross, and was resurrected on the third day giving us new life. I know that not all of you that read this blog are Christians. Believe me when I tell you, there is no judgment here. It has been a long time coming for me...believing. I have not always had faith. In fact, not until recently would I say that I had complete faith the God even existed. Thanks to Haiden, my faith is alive and well. I believe, because it makes sense to me. I believe, because if I didn't, why even get up in the morning. To me, there would be nothing to live for because there would be nothing to die for.

I have to admit, I am a baby Christian. I can't quote scripture, I don't know my way around the bible very well, and I basically have a child like understanding of it all. But that doesn't stop me in believing in God and believing that He knows what He is doing. I will tell you what I do know. Everything happens for a reason. Everything that happens is His plan. Of course, just like that rest of you, I don't always agree with, or understand the reasons behind it. I have to faith! Faith is what is getting me through this entire adoption process. Our pursuit of Martin is a good example. So much is involved in an international adoption. I know I don't have to explain this to many of you. There is so much paperwork, there are the stated laws, there are the unstated laws, there are guidelines, there are rules written and unwritten, and somehow we are expected to know all of them and adhere to them as well. Now, just because there are rules, laws, and guidelines, it doesn't mean that everyone has to follow them. You just have to know when, who, and where, and what lines can't be crossed. That is the hard part! After we lost Martin, I blurred the line. Let me tell you, I never meant any harm to anyone. It all started out with a simple suggestion from a friend that had been down the adoption road. Apparently, the suggestion wasn't as simple as I thought and I ended up getting a wonderful woman in trouble, and got ourselves into a little bit of trouble as well. I was so scared that we weren't going to be able to adopt because of this. So, we had just lost Martin, and then I might have just lost us another child as well. Not to mention, I got someone in trouble that has been so helpful to us. My faith in in everything was in jeopardy. I was losing hope and starting to question everything in my life. So, I took everyone's advice and started praying, and praying, and praying. I prayed until I fell asleep at night and when I woke up I would pick up where I left off. I didn't get the answers that I wanted. I was just hoping that God would leave a Post-It note on the coffee maker in the kitchen so I would see it in the morning. That never happened. What did happen was Paul. I asked for a child that would be a good match for our family, and for a child that needs us. I hope and I pray that Martin is with his loving family and that they love him more than I could. If this is true, and it has to be true, then this is part of God's perfect for 2 reasons. One, of course being that Martin has his family. Two, being another child has a chance at a life with a family that loves him more than he can imagine. Two children are now being saved. Two beautiful children living, but not really LIVING...being born again into a beautiful new life. I believe this is all possible through Him.

We are getting so close to our final goal of $21,000. We have a few more fundraisers lined up and I am so excited about them. I have such high hopes. But for now, I am going to ask...actually plead with all of you...please be Paul's Easter warrior. For those of you that don't know, Reece's Rainbow makes many successful attempts to raise money and awareness for the children on RR. The big ones are the Christmas Warrior and the Easter Warrior. The goal is for someone to become Paul's warrior and take it upon themselves to find donors. The goal is to reach $1000 but of course...the more the better! We are also hoping that everyone out there will make just a $25 donation to Paul's fund. We would be fully funded if just 132 more people would donate $25! Please, also help our family get Paul home by spreading the word and my blog. Every little bit helps, and you just never know who will see this page and want to help.

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